Exclusively dating vs boyfriend
Once we got out of high school and there wasn't 2000 other people our age around everyday asking who was dating who, and why that skank was near her man... lol lol My sorority sister is thinking about having the "talk" with the guy she's been dating.
Since the official statement isn't as big of a deal anymore people start assuming when it 'should have' happened. She wants to date them 1st (which might include her dating other guys at the same time--no strings attached)..if she likes 1 in particular & feels that the feeling is mutual, she'll want to make things exclusive, meaning she wants them BOTH to agree to only date eachother now. She doesn't like making things official until she's experienced what it's like to date a guy when he's only dating her.
If the two people guess different times, there's a problem. assume the following are listed in chronological order, but no one ever says "will you be my girlfriend/boyfriend)". Kind of like another topic I brought up a few months back when I said that dating someone is like getting a sneak preview into what they're gonna be like persay you got into a relationship with them, just like being in a relationship gives you a sneek peak into what it's going to be like persay you marry them. I'm very aware that having sex doesn't mean you're exclusive, unless both people verbally agreed that they're only having sex with eachother & no one else. Agree to only do certain things with eachother (no more dating other women or giving them the hint that things could go further than friendship---and courting a woman is the EASIEST/FIRST way to give out that signal) When it's straight up SAID it's an exclusive relationship, AND the actions match the words.. Everyone's definitions of "dating" and "relationship" and "committed" etc are different.
A person can spend all day with you, talk to you all the time, have sex with you, spend lots of money on you, introduce you to their friends & yet NOT consider themselves "with" you or serious with you, especially if they do those types of things with multiple people. It's not a topic to ignore and think it'll all work itself out exactly how you want/hope. And yes, that's where a lot of people trip themselves up (esp women in sexual relationships).. Never assume, assumption brings out some nasty shocks sometimes.
Some of you are going to say that it's not about the titles, but well...
Me & my girlfriends were talking about this recently & I was surprised that alot of people actually have different definitions of what it means to be "exclusive." To some, asking another person to be exclusive with you is the SAME as basically asking for a relationship/official title. I think acknowledging that everyone's definition of exclusive (or other things) may be different & actually trying to figure out those differences can actually save 2 people from a big misunderstanding, argument or long-term clash.